DUI for me?!

Talk about whatever you want.
Jayson
Sum bitch mutha fucka
Posts: 243
Joined: Sat Apr 16, 2005 8:37 pm
Location: Sioux City, IA
Contact:

DUI for me?!

Unread post by Jayson » Sun May 17, 2009 3:23 am

A reenactment of the events that occurred this morning at 2:32 AM:

Officer: Have you been drinking tonight?
Jayson: No. Well, I mean I had some Gatorade I think.
Officer: Can I see your license and registration please?
Jayson: Oh yeah, sure. (opens glove box and a bunch of greeting cards fall out)
Jayson: I think this is it.
Officer: No, this isn't current. We need your current information.
Jayson: Oh yeah, this must be it. (hands officer correct papers)
Officer: Can I have you step out of the car please?
Jayson: Yep.
Officer: I'm going to have you follow my finger with eyes only.
Jayson: Okay.
(Officer administers test)
Officer: Are you sure you haven't had any to drink tonight?
Jayson: I had some Gatorade and water and stuff.
Officer: Okay, can I have you take a deep breath and blow.
(Officer administers test)
Officer #2: Is that a real CB radio?
Jayson: Yeah, it's not hooked up though.
Officer: Well, looks like someone slipped you something in your Gatorade.
Jayson: Oh yeah?
Officer: What is your age?
Jayson: Twenty-three.
Officer: And what's the legal limit for drinking and driving?
Jayson: Point 0-eight. I mean 21.
Officer: And how old are you?
Jayson: 18, I mean no, 23.
Officer: Well since you've got flip flops on and it's kind of cold out I'm not going to make you do any of that stuff. But you blew .66
Jayson: Oh good.
Officer: So, are you sure you didn't have any alcoholic beverages tonight?
Jayson: Well I DID have a few beers.
Officer: Open your mouth please.
(shines flashlight into mouth)
Officer: Have you had any marijuana or illegal substances tonight?
Jayson: No.
Officer: First time I've ever seen orange tongue from anybody.
Jayson: Yeah, I just had some Gatorade.
Officer: Okay, I'll have you sit back in your vehicle, I'm going to issue you a warning for having your license plate light out.
Jayson: Yeah, I thought not telling you would help me.
Officer: Not telling me what?
Jayson: (uh)...my CB radio.
(I get back in my vehicle and a couple minutes pass. The officer returns with my papers)
Officer: Alright, I know you've been drinking and you thought you would play it cool by not telling the truth, but it will save you a lot of trouble in the meantime. You were going 22 down Floyd so that kind of tipped us off. Here's this (warning) and drive save.
(I roll up window)
Jayson: I'm #1.
(I drive home safely)

I didn't play it that smoothly and I didn't get fined anything. Therefore, I feel like a lucky bastard.

grant
Cobra Commander
Posts: 974
Joined: Wed Jul 03, 1985 6:01 am
Google Talk: gtgarvey
Location: Iowa
Contact:

Re: DUI for me?!

Unread post by grant » Sun May 17, 2009 12:46 pm

Nice, it costs a lot of money to have a DUI.

Dan
Band Member
Posts: 673
Joined: Wed Apr 20, 2005 1:27 am

Re: DUI for me?!

Unread post by Dan » Sun May 17, 2009 12:48 pm

Damn....you blew a 0.66? Im surprised you arent dead!

Jayson
Sum bitch mutha fucka
Posts: 243
Joined: Sat Apr 16, 2005 8:37 pm
Location: Sioux City, IA
Contact:

Re: DUI for me?!

Unread post by Jayson » Sun May 17, 2009 3:03 pm

Oops. .066, it was late when I wrote that.

WAD
Posts: 614
Joined: Sat Apr 16, 2005 4:30 pm

Re: DUI for me?!

Unread post by WAD » Sun May 17, 2009 4:43 pm

This is interesting in some regards to the fact that you were drinking orange Gatorade because they have done some studies that say orange juice will get someone to blow a .03 in many cases. Granted Orange juice and orange Gatorade our two different things. In addition to the fact that you said you blew a .66 (granted that has been corrected) would have put you 6 feet under before that point.

Dan
Band Member
Posts: 673
Joined: Wed Apr 20, 2005 1:27 am

Re: DUI for me?!

Unread post by Dan » Mon May 18, 2009 11:39 pm

Hah, well Ill have to remember to not drink orange juice before I go out driving because I lose my CDL if I blow a 0.04.

Post Reply